Stealth launch · pump.fun · Solana

$MONKE

no thoughts. head empty. hands buying.

He was drawn in four minutes by someone who has never seen an orangutan in person. He has no utility, no VC, no Telegram admin named Kevin. What he has is a face — and pump.fun does not have one yet. That's the whole plan.

CA dropping at launch — stealth means stealth
hand drawn ✏️
$MONKE, a hand-drawn orange orangutan with a grey muzzle and an unimpressed expression
0 thoughts detected
Exhibit A

A monke, allegedly

Every cycle CT adopts one animal that is drawn badly enough to be trusted. A dog with a hat. A frog with a hoodie. This time it's an orangutan who is fairly sure he's a gorilla, and nobody on the timeline has the heart to tell him.

$MONKE isn't a project. It's a character. He gets edited into your replies, pasted over your losses, and screenshotted at 3am. The token is just the part that makes it fun.

he is not smart. he is however extremely available.

Official monke specifications

  • Species: orangutan. Great ape. Critically endangered in real life, which is why the fees below exist.
  • Brain texture: peeled. No wrinkles, no folds, no doubts.
  • Diet: bananas, bananas, and the occasional bad entry.
  • Chart skills: none. Orange line pretty, so he buy.
  • Grip: diamond, mostly because he cannot work out how to sell.
  • Employment status: open to offers. Preferably from pump.fun.
The one mission

Get Alon to adopt him

pump.fun launches thousands of coins a day and doesn't have a face to put on any of it. We have a face. We have nothing else. This is a fair trade.

goal: unofficial mascot. stretch goal: official mascot. dream goal: profile picture.

Alon adoption meter

4% — he has not seen it yet
A banana-shaped gauge showing progress toward Alon adopting $MONKE
STEP 1

Post the monke

Reply to things with him. Quote tweet with him. Put him in your banner. A mascot becomes a mascot by showing up everywhere, not by being announced.

STEP 2

Tag @a1lon9 once

Once. Per post. With something funny attached. The plan is to be a good bit, not a notification problem.

STEP 3

Do not be weird about it

No DMs, no spam raids, no involving anyone's family. If it stops being funny it stops working, and the whole mission is that it's funny.

Bananomics

Nothing clever, on purpose

Standard pump.fun launch. No allocation, no unlocks, no roadmap that mentions the word "ecosystem". If you can read this, you're as early as everyone else.

Supply
1,000,000,000

The pump.fun default. Nobody has a bigger bag by design.

Launch
Stealth

No countdown, no whitelist, no private group. It just appears.

Team allocation
Zero

Same curve as you. Same click as you.

Liquidity
Bonding curve

Handled by pump.fun and burned at graduation. Nothing to rug.

Taxes
0 / 0

He can't count anyway.

Creator fees
To the apes

Routed to a real primate charity through donate.gg. Details below.

Fees for the apes

He's an orangutan. They're not doing great.

Bornean and Sumatran orangutans are critically endangered — mostly because the forest canopy they live in keeps getting cut down. Since the joke is an ape, the creator rewards go to apes — to a charity that works on this species and nothing else. We're routing them through donate.gg, which sends crypto straight to verified charities on-chain, so every transfer is publicly checkable.

The pick · orangutans, specifically

Orang Utan Republik Foundation

501(c)(3) · working in Sumatra & Borneo · orangutanrepublik.org

They work to save wild orangutans through conservation education and outreach in the places orangutans actually live — teaching the next generation of Indonesians why the forest is worth more standing up than cut down. Not a token gesture toward "wildlife". It's this exact animal.

They're on donate.gg with $0 raised and zero donations. Nobody has given them anything on-chain yet. A coin with a cartoon orangutan on it being their first donor is a genuinely funny sentence, and we intend to make it true.

Also on the list · habitat

Rainforest Foundation US

Backs Indigenous and forest communities defending the rainforest they live in. No canopy, no orangutan — a share goes here so the fees hit both the animal and the trees it lives in. Open on donate.gg →

How it works: creator rewards accrue on pump.fun, get swapped to SOL, and go out through donate.gg to the wallets above. Every transfer is a public Solana transaction, so the receipt gets posted and you can check the signature yourself instead of taking our word for it.

Bananamap

Four phases, one of which is bananas

Phase 1

Exist

Appear on pump.fun with no warning. Get called a scam by someone who then buys it.

Phase 2

Bananas

Sticker pack, reply images, banner set. The monke shows up in threads he was not invited to.

Phase 3

Alon

The meter fills. Somebody at pump.fun uses the monke unironically. We frame the screenshot.

Phase 4

Feed the apes

Fees hit the charity wallet, the receipt gets posted, and the joke turns out to have been useful.

Questions a monke could answer

FAQ

Is this affiliated with pump.fun?

No. Nobody there has agreed to anything, and nobody there knows this page exists. We're campaigning, not claiming. If Alon says no, he stays our mascot and we stay a bit annoying about it.

What does $MONKE do?

He sits there. He looks like that. Occasionally he gets used as a reply image. There is no staking, no game, no L2, and no whitepaper — there's a picture of an ape and a group chat.

Why a stealth launch?

So there's no presale to snipe and no insider round to complain about. It goes live, and either the timeline picks it up or it doesn't. That's the entire test.

Is he a gorilla?

He is an orangutan. He believes he is a gorilla. Both of these are load-bearing.

Will this make me money?

Almost certainly not. Memecoins go to zero far more often than they don't, this one has no revenue, no product and no floor, and you should treat anything you put in as spent. Buy the bit, not the retirement plan.